12 Reasons You Should Write a Book in 2014

To write or not to write? That is definitely the question. Lucky for you, I’ve got answers—12 of them, to be exact. Here’s my top 12 reasons you should publish your book in 2014:

1. Because it’s a much easier goal than that Ironman competition you almost signed up for at midnight on New Year’s Eve. I mean, seriously, do you think the Ironman officials will personally fix your non-essential appositives and compound sentence structure for you? We do that here. I’m just sayin’.
2. Because your cat will appreciate the quality time. Seriously. Try typing on a laptop and see how long it takes for your cat to come sprawl himself across the keyboard. Hey, if it worked for Hemingway…
3. Because publishing a collection of your best sermons is basically the written equivalent of a greatest hits album. How cool is that?
4. Because the panoramic view from a book-signing table beats the view from your Cheetos-dust-covered couch any day. Trust me on that one. I know someone who knows someone.
5. Because a collage of Instagram selfies does not an autobiography make.
6. Because your wife called today, and after hearing that same hilarious story 99 times, she thinks you’ve perfected the punch line and should bring it to a larger audience. Any audience. Just not the dinner table again.
7. Because it will finally give you a reason to go to bed early, and get up at 6 a.m. to write profound, earth-altering truths that future generations will revere and treasure. And I know you were looking for a reason to get up earlier.
8. Because a) the bully from middle school, b) the college prof who said you couldn’t write, and c) the high school girlfriend who broke up with you because she said you looked like Paul Pfeiffer from The Wonder Years are all waiting to find out if they were wrong about you. Fill ‘em in on what they’ve missed out on.
9. Because if you don’t, one of our editors will post on Facebook the number of Seinfeld reruns you watch in a week. We’re pretty sure you don’t want that number to go public.
10. Because if you don’t tell us your stories, that guy on the commercial with gray hair and the dapper jacket is going to go down as “The Most Interesting Man in the World.” We don’t want that to happen.
11. Because “getting into character” gives you an excuse to break out every Halloween costume you’ve worn since 1994. “Pirate Fridays”, here we come. Arggh!
12. Because you wanted to write a book last year.  And the year before. Because 2014 and 2015 have exactly the same number of hours (gasp!) as 2013, and there’s never going to be more time, less work, or self-sufficient kids in your living room who don’t need to be fed or clothed or entertained. So this year is just as good as any other year.

In all seriousness though, what book are you going to write in 2014? Can’t wait to hear from you!